I did absolutely nothing today.  Work was an absolute waste of my time, it’s become so mindless and irritating all I do is waste away there for 8 hours a day. I’d love to quit but I need to pay my bills and with the wedding approaching quiting isn’t a good idea.  However I know that I would be much happier trying to do comedy full time but with our lovely economy its just not feasible.  I did however update bits and pieces of my website, caught up on emails, & returned some phone calls.  I felt like handling my personal business while at work was a better decision.   Another non work related activity I participated in today was finally reading my friend Comedian Ryan Budds’ (<–hilarious) spec script of The Office.  It was very well written and had me laughing out loud kudos to him for that fine piece of work.

I was supposed to go hang out at Fizz tonight and support a room I help run however I fell asleep when I got home and woke up about 20 minutes before the show started, so I laid the egg on that one.  Sorry guys.  I won 3 impressive games on NHL 09 for xbox 360, 2 of which were in overtime.  If any of you out there are on xbox live my gamertag is SSSUDIO, if you have NHL 09 I will gladly take the time out of my not so busy life to beat you senseless.

I had Taco Bell for lunch today it was great as per usual.  I run for the border a lot and I know the menu like the back of my hand, I understand its pathetic but its the best fast food on the planet.  That’s the end of that.

I also finally watched American Movie today, it was amazing.  If you haven’t seen it do you self a favor and watch it, its streaming on Netflix, if you don’t have Netflix get that too.  It’s great especially when paired with xbox live.  I still have not seen Role Models, I am going to make an attempt to watch it over the weekend, but I will most likely spend my free time trying to finish reading Watchmen, so I could go see it.

So yea, basically I didn’t leave my couch today and the highlight of the day was my delicious Taco Bell, pretty exciting eh?

Tomorrow I’ll be doing the bulk of the hockey equipment shopping so that will involve me leaving the couch.

Well its time to head off to slumberland.

later alligators


at least i was somewhat productive

I didn’t blog yesterday because I felt like sleeping was a better choice, and once again I am not sorry.

Today is St. Patrick’s Day and I don’t give a shit.  I am not irish or religious so I really don’t care, sorry.  I do like to drink, and watch people make a mess of themselves however I have to be up at 5am tomorrow to go to a job that makes me want to cut myself, that place made me want to get stinking drunk today but I had a change of heart when I left.

I went out to shop for some hockey equipment this evening, I haven’t played in 6 years so I am completely out of touch with the technology and have gained about 40lbs since I’ve last played (im 210 now) since I’m a fat ass now I have no clue what size I am in anything so this going to be interesting, however the point of this experience is to lose weight we’ll see what happens.  I ended up only buying a stick and elbow pads tonight, however I am shopping online as we speak, I buying strictly clearance and closeouts to spend as less as possible.  I am excited though, I don’t get joy out of much in life anymore so this is kind of making me feel better about myself.  However I am sure i’ll be miserable about it when I realize how out of shape I am.

I will keep my word by posting video and pictures from these shenanigans.

I probably mentioned this but I am at The Improv in Schaumburg all weekend, I am looking forward to it.  Its an awesome room, and I’m glad I get to perform there on a regular basis.  The staff is fucking amazing and they do it right, they know how to make the comics comfortable and thats not something that happens at all clubs.  Its always pleasure to work that room.

Oh yea and I hate American Idol again.  It’s absurd.  My fiancee loves it though, she does watch the worst fucking shows ever.  I scold her for it constantly.  John & Kate plus 8, DWTS, Bridezillas, & etc… I don’t know they all make me want to vomit.  She can’t help it though.  It’s ok she’s still awesome in my book.

ok thats enough of my uninteresting thoughts.

later alligators


Yes I know I was only 3 days in to the blog and I slacked off.
I’d like to say I have good reason to but I don’t.  I will do my best to not let it happen again, I apologize to all of the people who aren’t reading this.  Anywho I had a pretty good weekend so I’m in a fairly good mood right now.  I opened for Vic Dunlop at The Funny Bone in Bloomington, IL.  This is one of my favorite rooms, the staff is awesome (GM Luke Swanson is a true professional), the crowds are great, its just a good time and thats all that matters getting paid at the end of the weekend feels like an added bonus.  Vic is a super nice guy and a veteran of stand up comedy it was nice to get some insight from someone who has 33 years of experience, and he’s tenacious on stage.  I really enjoyed his sets all weekend, I also got to work with a friend of mine Cindy Cornelsen, she recently moved to LA it was nice to catch up and get a chance to see some of her new work which by the way is hilarious.   As usual I was super lazy while I was on the road, I didn’t bring my computer so I did not blog, watch anything on HuLu or play online poker.  I barely read any of the book I brought, however I did sleep a lot and that was totally awesome.  In addition to the copious amounts of slumber I managed to smoke a pack and a half of cigarettes, drink, eat hardees.  So yea it was a fun weekend even though my diet is absolute shit.  With that said I am going to start working out in maybe the most dangerous way possible.  I am going to start playing Hockey again.  Yes that’s right, I will be back on the ice.

I played hockey my entire life up until about 6 years ago and thats when my diet and physique started to go south.  So within the next couple weeks I will be purchasing the necessary equipment to make my triumphant return to the ice.  I will video tape the shenanigans and post it on the blog, it will be pathetic.  Speaking of hockey I went to the blackhawks game today with my brother, and they lost to New York Islanders (Currently worst record in the NHL) and they also faced a goalie who had his first NHL start, Fuck You guys you ruined my fun weekend.  I also ate shitty chinese food tonight, however I got over it really fast as I was consumed with the roast of larry the cable guy, Greg Giraldo is fucking genius.

So yea, it was a fun weekend I am not looking forward to the day job tomorrow but oh well I need to pay bills, I am getting married in little less than 3 months…  (Fuck that’s soon)

Anywho I’ll be at the Improv this weekend for 5 shows Mar 20-22nd heres the link (Come see me!)

I think that’s all I have to report at this moment.

PS- I did not proofread this at all.

later alligators