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Can it get any worse?

Not that any of you care but I still have bronchitis.

I also drank the worst flavor Gatorade ever today, here it is:


Its part of the Gatorade Tiger Series, its called True Force.  It took some serious force for me to get it down, it tasted like blueberry at first but then it finished with a horrific melon taste.  Which reminded me of the “Fierce Melon” flavor, which most of us remember tasted like absolute shit.  As a golfer and a fan of golf I strongly believe that Mr. Eldrick “Tiger” Woods is a perfectionist and a man that believes quality is imperative, with that said I don’t believe that he tasted this flavor.  It’s fucking awful.  All fans of the Gatorade  family please stay away from this flavor, your taste buds will thank me.

I also believe that this being sick is a good time to quit smoking, however I’ve said that I’d quit numerous times, but I am on a good streak.  It’s been 6 days and I’m free of Vinyl Chloride, Urethane, & Nickel (some of the toxins as explained in those heinous “Truth” commericials).  I feel better when I wake up in the morning but I still crave those disgusting sticks of tobacco, we’ll see what happens.

Speaking of disgusting the new Dancing With The Stars premiered tonight, what a piece of shit that is.  Just another thing that America ripped off from the UK, I am willing to bet it is done better over there.  The casting producers did a great job I might add, Denise Richards, Holly Madison, & Steve-O.  Those are some quality humans, don’t want to forget Jewel’s (please fix your teeth, you don’t live in your car anymore) Rodeo Champion husband, seriously who gives a flying fuck I hate all of these people.  However I would love to see Lawrence Taylor snap someones limb on live TV a la Joe Theismann (watch video here).

There are others like me that hate it but oh well, I’m sure it will get killer ratings and it will give all the dead behind the eyes housewives something to look forward to week after week while getting drunk of shitty $4 wine from Trader Joes.

Also if anyone out there has the power,  please cancel John & Kate Plus 8, freakish child birth disgusts me.  I hate that your family gets all this free shit and a TV show just because of your abnormal ability to produce children in mass quantity.  I hate you.

In positive news:

Family Guy was fucking amazing last night, if you didn’t see it I suggest watching it on  If you don’t like Family Guy, I hate you.

Role Models comes out on DVD tomorrow, I’ve heard its amazing, I can’t wait to see it.

I am performing at Comedy Upstairs @ Fizz!  this Wednesday at 9PM 3220 N Lincoln Chicago IL, the line up is really solid its being hosted by the very funny Jack Calhoun & features my favorite comic in Chicago Marty DeRosa.  Its only $5 and there’s lots of solid drink specials, The Office isn’t on Wednesdays so you can leave your house.

later alligators